Monday, 30 January 2012

Bonkers

I realise there is a general perception that I am slightly mad. Most of the time my friends are quite correct and I don't complain about their assessment. Occasionally, however, I would like to point out that It's Not Just Me!

The large muddy-hole-in-the-ground-which one-day-will-become-a-pond collects about six inches of water when it rains. Although we've not had much cold weather this winter, the edges have frozen on more than one occasion.



This has led Management* to have all sorts of ideas. He reckons if Derwentwater and Bassenthwaite can freeze up then our little pond could get pretty solid if we have a prolonged cold spell.

He and his sailing chum are planning a Skating Party ..... I have reminded them that when full, the pond will "only" be three foot deep, therefore when they fall through the ice I will not try to rescue either of them.

I'll be too busy holding the body underwater on the basis that anyone who falls through the ice whilst wearing real ice-skates (oh yes, sailing chum intends to go about this "Properly") is going to slice a hole in a very expensive pond liner. I've also pointed out that anyone who commited such a transgression would find drowning in freezing water preferable to what I'd do to them if they got out . . . . Honestly, they don't have these problems on Dancing On Ice.



* oh please, did you think he was the sensible one in this household?

12 comments:

  1. I'd be pretty angry to if our pond liner was ripped - not only do you need to replace the liner but to do so means emptying everything out of the pond and barring digging the hole - starting again!

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    1. It's OK Sue, I think they have now realised the risk factor involved in this little plan.

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  2. Threaten to set that rat on them if there dare to so much as think about it.

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    1. Great idea Pat, but they're more scared of me than one little rat!

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  3. Perhaps you might also want to mention which appendage(s) the blades will also slice through before aforesaid skater loses consciousness {g}

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    1. Too graphic James, I thought it best to smile and leave the rest to their imaginations. (I suppose I could have started muttering about sharpening the chainsaw chain .....)

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  4. We'll have to assume that spear-fishing will also be a no-no, no matter the weather. *giggle*

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    1. Kris, Management and Sailing Chum might be daft but they are not stupid enough to think I'd let them get away with such activity!

      I would hope the only creature 'spear fishing' in our big pond will be the local heron (and he'll have to be content with frogs and toads).

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  5. What makes you think we thought either of you were sensible?!

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    1. Well CB, at least he is sensible enough to steer clear of the port ...

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  6. Hahahaha! The post made me laugh, but the comments made me ROFL!!!

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    1. Morning Nutty, glad we gave you a smile, made me laugh too, not sure about Management though, don't know if he's read them {giggle}

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