Sunday, 19 December 2010

Major sense of humour failure

If I type what I said this morning the blog will get deleted for obscenity. Looking out of the utility window whilst preparing bird food first thing I knew there was something wrong with the paddock fencing which goes around the corner of the garden but I couldn't work out what it was.

It didn't take long to realise the problem was the attention of some miserable b*st*ard after dark last night, probably on their way back from a pub. It would have taken a considerable amount of strength to rip this stuff - it's reinforced and of reasonable quality.

It's not the end of the world, no-one was hurt, nothing was nicked, whoever it was didn't come into the garden and I have put the netting mostly back into place with cable ties. Management and I planned to do a fair amount of work to this fence over the holidays to ensure that our new Puppy cannot escape through it or under it but that's not the point. We've reported it to the Police not with any expectation of ever knowing who did it, but in case there were other incidents the same night. Let's just hope I never find the culprit, Management knows I would have no hesitation in punching them very hard in the face, regardless of how big they are.


  1. Oh, man, doesn't it tick you off bigtime when someone damages something you've worked long and hard to build. In the grand scheme it's not a big deal, but it cost you a lot of hard work and time, not to mention a fair amount of money, to get it the way you wanted it. All to be the subject of somebody's destructive whim!!! Bummer!!

  2. Curious - it's not as if you are close walking from the pub, I don't think, and if kids had been responsible, I would have thought that you would have the snow trampled all over, and certainly the snow on the wall would have been disturbed?

    Mind you, can't think what else it could be though! A JCB bucket/wide load rounding the corner getting snagged, perhaps?

  3. Great. Don't you just love having people like that on the planet. Let alone walking past your house. There is a name for them, but it would be impolite to put it on here.

  4. Thank you all,

    FFG: you're right, it's only a bit of nylon netting but it's bluddy irritating.

    Hazel: although it seems we're isolated, we are on a route from the A66 up to the top of the village. This will have been some p*ssed w*nker late at night. A JCB would have done way more damage - you should have seen what a low-loader did to the church wall up the lane last winter.

    CB: I suspect you and I share some unladylike vocabulary on occasions like this {gg}

  5. I can well imagine the words you came out with! The same ones crossed through my mind when I saw the pics. Some strange folk about!

  6. Thanks Jill, Management is collecting a nailer/staple gun as I type (bless him). Trouble is, currently minus 9.8 in the potager which is too cold for my fingers to work outside for more than 5 minutes at a time!

  7. Bummocks! I hate random destruction. Actually I hate planned destruction too - don't know why I put it like that!

    "He tripped and fell against my fist, Constable!" (I'd buy that.)

  8. Bummocks

    Yeah, Flummery gets the prize for the best word of the week!

    "MY fist just flew towards his nose, Officer, sort of like Turrets but more satisfying"

  9. boo, not good.
    On the bright side... new puppy? More info please :o)

  10. Hi Nic, haven't been saying much about new Four-Paws - don't want to tempt fate.

    Toddle off to here and there have been a couple of other posts since this one.

  11. I think firing the staple gun into moron's tender parts might have a therapeutic effect as well. That or 400 volts of three phase.

    Heck, would it be too mean to suggest both?

    Maybe next time they try there will be a nice, prickly shrub in the way - Pyracantha burglaris disembowellus thrives in Cumbrian soil {g}

  12. James, whilst Cumbria Constabulary were very sympathetic I don't think they would be permitted to side with me if I adopted your suggestions (although the thought has crossed my mind).

    Pyracantha is an excellent idea - Berberis thunbergii is far more deadly however.

  13. I'd want to do a series of choice manoeuvres on the culprit too BW - it's just the same with random acts of vandalism on the plot - no point in it and I can't see why it is considered to be fun!

  14. Thanks GLA, sadly there are too many miserable b*ggers around who seem to think destroying someone else's hard work is amusement.

  15. Hi Bilbo....I agree with you....just so irritating.
    Whilst I have the patience of a saint with children animals and wildlife, this does not extend to humans who take, touch, hurt anything that I have worked hard for or love. I understand the 'no matter how big' I would be just the same on this one.

    Hope the little fluffy one is doing well......

  16. Thanks Cheryl.

    Little Fluffy One not here yet - we collect him on Monday, only two more sleeps!


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